What is resilience? Resilience is a person’s ability to cope with & achieve good outcomes despite serious threats, adversity & risks (Elder, Evans & Nizette 2005, pg. 120). Resilience isn’t about ‘toughing up’ or ‘getting on with it’ but is something that we internally develop & build upon over a life time. Building resilience comes over all phases of the lifespan and is something we are can attribute to both genetics & environmental factors. We have all heard of those people “that seem to smile through all the worst luck”. We may feel that they are overly optimistic, ‘faking it’ or genuinely they have built up resilience and can overcome whatever hurdles are being thrown at them through inner emotional strength & positive self-awareness.
Building resilience naturally starts off at a very young age but is built upon through positive, supportive parenting input & the child’s own cognitive skills. Does this mean that anyone who isn’t resilient must have had inadequate parenting? No, not at all. There are several other factors that can influence a person’s ability to be resilient. These are not limited to:
- A positive sense of self & worth
- Independence & competence
- Self-regulation of mood
- Cognitive ability
- Perseverance
- Contact with supportive, nurturing adults & community.
For example: a child who displays adaptive behavior, when in less than ideal conditions, is more likely to have received ‘good enough’ parenting in their younger years which led them to be considered resilient. In comparison, take a teenager who is homeless, they show resilience by their representation & sense of self-reliance, competence, perseverance and independence despite limited contact with a supportive community & non- existent, nurturing adult care.
What does resilience look like?
- Trust that people are caring & the world is safe.
- Belief in their own ability to be independent & achieve desired goals & targets.
- Positive feelings about themselves & a sense of self-worth & value.
- Optimism that events will turn out for good.
- The ability to regulate their emotions, feelings & behaviours.
Does a professional sportsperson who has injured themselves give up and submit to the fact their season is over & career is on the line? No, they use their resilience to trust medical staff & believe in their personal ability to successfully rehabilitate. They maintain a positive mindset & optimism about the future and uphold their goal to return to professional sport. Although utterly disappointed they remain realistic about their current predicament & work towards controlling what outcomes they can. Despite current circumstances & a dramatic change in their life they have a sense within themselves that they will come out of these events and that time goes on.
How do we build resilience?
- 30 day challenge: Each day is a new opportunity to see a positive & be thankful for what we do have
- Mindfulness : There are lots of apps & free online programs to help you participate
- Set a goal: What do you want to achieve in the next 6 -12 months? Make it happen!
- Learn something new: Increase your capabilities & self-confidence by learning a new fact or researching a topic every week.
The lesson for us all is that we can make changes for the better & ultimately we alone control how we live our personal life through the everyday choices we make.
